Thoughts on Thirty

It’s no secret that I am a lover of all holidays and birthdays.  However this year, I’m approaching my birthday with a tad bit more apprehension, as I am turning the dreaded 3-0 in 30 days.  Gasp!

One of my earliest birthday memories was my 6th birthday.  As my mom and dad were busy inside preparing for my birthday party with family, I was outside on the front porch swinging and climbing on the aluminum railing (probably after being told not to), enjoying the sunshine, and anxiously awaiting the party guests.  I was SO excited to be turning 6, on the 6th, something I thought was remarkably cool.  This anxious, excited feeling returns every 365 days or so. 😉

Every year I look forward to my birthday.  May is my favorite month, and typically Spring is beginning to peek through by this day, which is my favorite season.  In 2016, my 28th birthday, Justin proposed to me the day AFTER my birthday (because holidays should never actually be combined, but enhanced by another day), while we were celebrating with my family.  As he should, he knows that my birthday is very special to me, and what better gift can a girl get than a sparkly round, solitaire diamond accompanied by a damn handsome man you get to keep for the rest of your life?  (The answer: None.)  Read more about our engagement story here.

All jokes aside, turning thirty doesn’t seem all that scary.  This year is my first birthday as Amanda Peterson, and that feels exciting in itself.  I’ve been told that life only get better as you age, and your thirties are all about enjoying the hard work of your twenties.  With that in mind, I’ve thought up a couple goals I’d like to accomplish in the coming years as a means to embrace life, love, and happiness.

Care less about others, and more about myself.  This might sound conceited, but I have always had so much anxiety surrounding what other people think of me.  My every thought is consumed by it – “Will they like my hair?” “Will they think this outfit is appropriate?” “Will they notice the couple lbs I gained/lost?” “Do they even like me?!” It makes me miserable, and now that I’m almost thirty, it’s time to let go of that.  WHO CARES what “they” think.  What matters is what I think, and what makes me comfortable. By this point, I am who I am, and if someone can’t accept that, then they shouldn’t be a part of my life moving forward.

Be my best self.  This kind of goes hand-in-hand with the above, but I want to become my best self — physically, mentally, and spiritually.  This means more intense workouts to shape my body back to its optimal and natural state, a cleaner diet that fuels me, rather than feeds me, and meditation.  By meditation I don’t necessarily mean crossing my legs and chanting “Om”, but taking a few moments every day to express my gratitude – maybe before I go to sleep at night, or first thing when I wake up, before I grab my phone and start scrolling social media.  I want to focus more on the good in my life, and less on the bad.

Be patient. I’ve always been so anxious for the next step in life, that I often overlook what’s currently happening.  I was so anxious to get engaged, so anxious to get married, and so anxious to start a family.  I need to slow down – breathe – and enjoy life as it happens. I have learned in my twenties that anxiousness cures nothing, and often times life won’t always go as I plan.   It’s time I learn the value of patience, and quit seeking the next thing, and let life happen naturally.

When you’re a teenager, all you want to do is buy beer. But once you hit 30, all you want to do is to get carded. – Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City

Cheers to turning thirty, birthdays, holidays, and celebrations of all kinds. XOXO